Words that suck, thoughts on WIPs.

Advanced Global Personality Test Results Extraversion |||||||||| 33% Stability |||||||||||||| 60% Orderliness |||||||||||||||| 66% Accommodation |||||||||||||| 56% Interdependence |||||| 30% Intellectual |||||||||| 36% Mystical |||||||||||| 50% Artistic |||||||||||||||| 63% Religious |||||| 23% Hedonism |||||||||| 36% Materialism |||||| 30% Narcissism |||||||||| 36% Adventurousness |||||||||| 36% Work ethic |||||| 23% Self absorbed |||||||||| 36% Conflict seeking || 10% Need to dominate |||||||||||| 43% Romantic |||||||||||| 50% Avoidant |||||||||||||| 56% Anti-authority |||||||||||| 43% Wealth |||||| 30% Dependency |||||||||||||||| 70% Change averse |||||||||||||||| 70% Cautiousness |||||||||||| 43% Individuality |||||||||||| 50% Sexuality |||||| 23% Peter pan complex |||||||||||||||||| 76% Physical security |||||||||||||||||| 76% Physical Fitness |||||||||||||||| 64% Histrionic |||||||||||| 50% Paranoia |||||| 23% Vanity |||||||||| 36% Hypersensitivity |||||||||||||||| 63% Indie |||||||||||||||||| 71%

Take Free Advanced Global Personality Test
personality tests by similarminds.com

As I write more, I'm starting to realize my word choices are driven very much by what I think sounds good, almost in a poetic sense. This means my writing is most likely robbed of any words I just don't like the sound of. As I was reading a Margaret Atwood story the other day, I came across the phrase "he'll be bald as an egg" and my mind immediately was like, Ew, no. I don't like the word "egg" at all. It's such a weak word for metaphors. Okay, "egg" is not a very valuable addition to vocabulary, as I would obviously have no aversion to using it literally ("he picked up eggs at the store"), cause in that case it's like...not my fault. But I have found that I, as well as a lot of other people, really hate the word "tender." I often write a sentence like, "He tenderly handled..." and then end up backspacing and replacing it with "gently" because I REALLY HATE THAT WORD. It just reminds me of a steak or something when I read it. Like, I'm holding you in the same way that I chew on my filet mignon, baby.

I have arrived at the fact that I am really not sure whether I am ever going to finish my super-long QAF W.I.P. There are several...problems...with it. I recently saw a comment - I think it was somewhere in qaf_marathons - when someone said that she is dissatisfied with the plethora of AU fics that don't recognize the automatic result of the alterations they'd made as a result of relationships developing in different ways. Certain questions have to be considered, such as, "Would Brian have taken as much of a part in Gus's life if Justin hadn't been around?", because Brian's actions, particularly, are often influenced by other people in his life, if they are important. The problem with my fic is not that I didn't consider these things, but that perhaps the result of distorting canon in the way that I did leads to an alternate universe that maybe nobody wants to read. I decided that if such-and-such happened, Justin Taylor would not be the Justin that we know, but does anybody want to read a story in which Justin isn't Justin, and more importantly, do I want to write it? And is it even possible for my au jus to come through and recover himself in a way that does justice to the bravery and independence that was so strongly attached to his character in the show? I guess it's not surprising that the thing is starting to seem a lot longer than I expected it to be (though not exceptionally long compared to other fics I've seen by any stretch), when the process of developing a relationship in the given situation would realistically be no less than an extremely gradual process.

I'm not really agonizing over this at all; the muse has gone on quite a respite and I'm mainly planning out my most recent plot bunny. I think I'm doing an overall better job now of thinking about the process of writing a longer fic, which is something I've never completed before (the kind of overwhelming unfamiliarity of it is part of the reason the other AU is kind of a mess). I often find that a change of location kind of alters my writing psyche or whatever-the-fuck, sometimes in a good way and sometimes not. I'm always coming up with new ideas when I'm on vacations, sleeping in unfamiliar towns. But my mind was completely dead the night I moved into my dorm.